Of the hundreds of different types of stone available at just about any garden store, when I think manliness, I think basalt. Basalt is a fine grained lava rock which is normally cools to a handsome mix of grey and black after its violent spewing birth from a volcano, but I think one of basalt's most striking features is it's naturally columnar form. What screams phallic symbol better than a massive chunk of vertical black stone birthed of fire and iron?
In fact Led Zeppelin, the greatest rock and roll band of all space and time to have ever rocked (or rolled), thought basalt formations were so phenomenal that it was used as the setting for the Houses of the Holy album cover in 1973. (featuring tunes like "The Song Remains the Same" and "No Quarter"... dang.) Covered with the writhing nude bodies of young blondes, what rock could ever offer more of a legacy than this? This is truly rock's rock of choice.
Basalt is like God's jet-black-with-white-flames-painted Ferrari F-430, an imposingly sinister specimen. It's as though Moses melted beauty in the burning bush on Mount Sinai, and was presented on high with basalt in it's stead. In the Garden Man-scape, basalt should be used as a focal point either hidden in amongst a variety of plants or near a path or crossroads to add interest and signal the importance of a space. Speaking of space, basalt has been found on the lunar surface of our moon and has been confirmed on Mars. Imagine having a giant chunk of columnar space rock in your backyard garden to show the ladies you mean intergalactic business. Besides, if they don't like it, your Star Wars friends will be impressed.
Basalt also makes a fantastic fountain piece with a large hole bored directly through its center. Best used in groups of a couple to a bunch, try mixing fountain and non-fountain basalt together to create a really killer focal piece. Larger basalt chunks are large enough to use as individual seats or laid on their side can make excellent benches that appear ageless an unweilding. The uses of basalt are limitless, just like the wily cunning of man.
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